Get me out of here - OK but where to?

We may think that the world is small planet peopled by protesting humans in the richer parts for more stuff to get their mitts on and peopled in the poorer parts where they have to live on two grains of wheat a day and have to make do with water in which cattle have p*ssed. And then we have the what I think is known as Generation X or Z. Dim-witted, no-brained twenty somethings that think they know it all and want to change the planet so that it is fit for robots. Take a look at what is on show in Australia, known as ‘I am a Celebrity, Get me Out of Here’. Showcasing some of the best opiniated characters. A politician, although he can’t remember. A singer, song-writer, nice guy who has left his stunning wife to do their TV slot in the UK. Also to cap it all a former boxer, and a female food critic who on ‘Medical’ grounds has thrown in the towel. Then we have an American youngish woman, sister of an singing prodigy. But I believe there is something not quite right about America and Americans. You could ask what did these people expect? Even though there are safeguards the insects and other animals have not been told and are joyfully taking part. There must be signposts in the jungle that say ‘Snakes this way---->’. ‘Spiders welcome, free food called Nella’. And forget about sleeping properly, these night creatures love singing. Or in human parlance, it is called snoring.

Now I am no stranger to this sort of life. On exercise with the Dutch Army there is no hot water on the heath and amongst the trees. If you needed a toilet, you were told see that tree? You will sleep in tents that are too small so your feet are sticking out. Not so bad in winter time as long as you keep boots and socks on. Life of the conscripts in my days was pretty stark but fun. There was no time to complain or even grumble. Up at 6am and get on with it. Just what is missing in Australia. We are pampered today, we have opinions today, we eat too much and only eat what we like today. You can observe people like Nella and know exactly how the world will be in twenty years time. If it is still there, that is. Because these are the characters, I think they call themselves ‘Influencers’, that will destroy whatever is left of our society. A sad tale is woven in Australia and basically it should be a ‘wake-up’ call to all of us here in Blighty. Just so everyone understands what Blighty is, it is a slang word for the UK or Great Britain and was coined during WW2 I believe.

This morning on the last glorious day of the cold month of November when I wear six pairs of socks, three shirts, a coat and a woolly hat (Yes, I follow the Aussie soap opera and can moan with the best), the news is that the American has escaped. The hunting party is probably out and I fully suspect the traumatised body to be brought back before nightfall. Or maybe not, let her go and then let’s all agree that as I already have said, there is something wrong with Americans. Mind you, old warhorse Nigel chickened out as well. Couldn’t hold his breath long enough to pick a few measly stars from below 3 feet of swamp water with frogs, snakes and God knows what else was swimming around his nether regions but motormouth Nige could not face a dipping. Loads of people have that problem. A fear of water. I like to drink it but would turn my nose up for water in which those critters were swimming. However, us plucky Brits are still facing the unthinkable in the jungle, grinning and bearing it. So, come on Nella tell everyone what you think of ‘m. My money is on you to win the show.